This short work was composed specifically for the Birmingham ElectroAcoustic Sound Theatre (BEAST) website, and plays ironically on the relationships of the text-heavy web to sound, the ‘youthfulness’ of the web, and the parallels between web art and early computer music developments. Since the web is very reading intensive, and since sound software for the web works very well with spoken word, this piece employs three spoken self-reflexive phrases: — “How do you want this read?” — “Am I supposed to read this like a child?” — “Let’s try this out here.”